Showing posts with label ablutions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ablutions. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Home Ablutions of the Irritating Kind

Will someone please explain to me why in my house I can't address an area's issues just ONCE and be done with it FOREVER? Why is it that things have to get dirty, not get emptied or maybe closed - whatever - and need to be done again and again?

Below are just three of the many things I find irritating about home maintainence. (I'm sure I will think of others in the days to come and, of course, I'll gladly share those, too.)

I'm certainly not talking about fashions and stuff like that, which I obviously know little about, (just ask mental m or jules), I'm talking about things that need doing over and over, ad nauseum. Like cleaning the floors, emptying the garbage/recycle bins, closing the garage door, etc., etc., etc......

I'm firmly of the school that continual household ablutions and other chores should be banned, or at the very least be automatic. It would be so much easier if all the floors were tile and each room with a drain in the middle of each room. a powerful hose could take care of the cleaning in a few jiffy!

We have a garbage/recycling drawer in our kitchen. Why aren't each of them connected to their corresponding outdoor units so the inside units automatically empty to the outside ones? This would save enormous amounts of time I spend picking up chewed garbage my Stella-dog strews everywhere in my kitchen. "Carry the dang garbage out!" you say? I do if the bin is full. If it's not, I've been threading a yard stick between the handles of the towel drawer above it and the garbage drawer. And now Stella-bella has figured out how to open the drawer anyway and have her way with the leftovers.

You know how, in many cars today, the light automatically shut off after the car's been vacant for a set amount of time? Why doesn't the garage door do that? Just close itself automatically after five minutes. How hard would that be? It would save me yelling at various and sundry members of my family that the pipes WILL freeze and they WILL have to PAY FOR IT!

There. I feel much better. I'm through squackin' cranky (for now). Thank for letting me unburden.

P. S. - Jules just asked what's on TNT as it is one of her favorite channels. Oh dear...WWF wresteling is on TNT. I'm beginning to get concerned about her TV viewing habits. I think she's been spending WAY too much time with her 7-year-old who is totally obsessed with the WWF. Jules, PLEASE tell me you're not going over to the ~dark side~. I just couldn't TAKE that! (Well, I guess maybe Stone-Cold Steve Austin is kinda cute in a gross wrestler kind of way.
xoxo&squacks to you,
t-s annie
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Huh? I keep telling you to get a Roomba from woot! Stella needs to get back in that durn crate. And train your rugrats to do some of that crap. Please notice below how Augie handles his laundry. Take special note of the marbling technique he has perfected on his NEW towels. Yessiree he is the champion laundry expert in our house. We won't discuss the great shoe debacle of 2008, though. Will we?
Anyway, I think we do too much house work and not nearly enough squackin'. Love & squacks, MPM

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Yes, we all have different home groans..here are my top 10 tics


Top 10 things that tic me off!

-Being….
1. The only one that remembers to feed the dog.
2. The only one to make the beds…load the dishwasher, and feed the family.
3. The only one to grocery shop for food that goes bad in the fridge b-cause "they don’t like it!"
4. The only one that can run the washer and dryer, fold and return clothes to their proper drawer.
5. Told by their daughters they have no clothes to wear…yet their closets would put many boutiques to shame.
6. Told by your daughters they need spa treatments after I have done all of the above.
7. The only one to assist with 1st grade homework…make costumes for the school play and attend tedious PTA meetings.
-Having…
8. Your husband home when he normally is not (just breaks my mojo).
9. Muffin top over my jeans.
-And finally, the last thing that tics me off is...
10. Me, for doing it all and not saying NO!

Just squrants and squraves
Jules.

Monday, February 11, 2008

Evening Ablutions

As a woman of a certain age, I am discovering that it now takes an inordinate amount of time to get ready for bed nowadays. I feel the need to squack about it. Let's see: wash face, apply vitamin C serum, essential oil, mosturizer and eye cream. Apply rash ointment on upper arms because I have some sort of old lady winter rash. Do asthma inhalers. Floss and brush. Apply scar ointment on all repaired sun damage areas. Move to the bed. Apply lavender baby lotion to arms and legs to promote restful sleep. Apply foot cream to promote soft feet. Apply lip balm to keep them from drying up and falling off during the night. Good grief, writing all this crap down has made me tired. Love and squacks, MP Mama.

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For God's sake, woman, what's with all that stuff you do?? Does it actually do anything?? Then again, what would I know. Sad to say I just brush my teeth, put on my jammies (a big tee-shirt - soooo sexy, thank you) and get into bed...and my bod loves me for that. You can tell, just by looking at me, how well preserved I am. (sigh)
squacks & kisses,
t-stone annie
~~~

Oh for F*#k's sake...brush and floss, squack and snore...I'm just sayin', Jules

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Sunday, February 10, 2008

SKWAK•N

What we do here... We squack. We squack a lot because we have opinions we aren't averse to sharing with all we know.

We're just sippin and squackin'.
Sippin' and squackin'.
It's what we do.
And we do it well.
Just ask our families.


Squacks & kisses,